Jokes, Quotes & Sayings for Turning Fifty and other 50th Birthday Pranks
Jokes For Turning 50

50th Birthday Jokes
- Sayings, Quotes and Pranks

Looking for a funny Joke for Turning 50?

Turning 50 is a huge milestone! We'll be bring you dozens of jokes, quotes and sayings for turning 50 plus 50th birthday pranks, quotes, sayings and ideas.

Turning 50 is more fun with the right gag gifts and 50th birthday decorations. If you need anything for that special 50th birthday we'll have it here.

Here's a great funny cartoon joke for turning 50...

Question: When do you know when you've turned 50?
Answer: When you and your teeth no longer sleep together.

"You know you're fifty when your back goes out more than you do."

At 50 you no longer have hot flashes, you have power surges!

Don't wake up grumpy on your 50th birthday -- let her/him sleep in.

"Fifty year olds are only good for two things, naps and farts!" - Dane Peddigrew

Your fifties is the stage in your life when you become mature, reliable and dependable. In other words, boring, predictable and conventional.

The only way to relieve the frustration of being fifty-something is to constantly seek new ways of irritating the young. Fortunately in old age, you develop the ability to do this naturally in every single thing you do or say.

At 50 you become an official member of the "Piss & Moan" club.

Happy 20th anniversary of your 30th Birthday!

“Looking fifty is great if you’re sixty.”

Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.

At 50 getting some action means all those prunes your doctor is making you eat are doing their job.

A 50 year old asks the kids to set up a page on MyFace but can't understand what they're giggling about.

First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down.

You might be 50 if...
• You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
• You sing along with elevator music. Your eyes won't get much worse.
• Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
• Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
• In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
• People call at 9:00 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
• Things you buy now won't wear out.
• You can eat dinner at 4:00 PM.
• You can almost live without sex but not your glasses.

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Jokes for Turning 50 2011